The holiday season is supposed to be full of joy, isn’t it? Festive dinners, twinkling lights, and cosy gatherings—that’s what we’re shown everywhere. But if you’re anything like me, you know it’s not always that simple. The truth is, this time of year can stir up a lot of emotions, and not all of them are merry and bright.
For some of us, the holidays bring an ache we can’t ignore. Maybe it’s the empty chair at the table that reminds you of someone you’ve lost. Maybe it’s the weight of feeling like you’re not where you thought you’d be in life. Or maybe it’s just the pressure of trying to keep up with the picture-perfect holiday moments everyone else seems to be having. Whatever it is, it’s real, and it’s hard.
I’ve felt it too—that mix of joy and sadness that’s hard to put into words. There have been years where I’ve celebrated with a full heart and others where I’ve just tried to get through the day. And I’ve learnt that’s okay. The holidays don’t have to look a certain way for them to matter.
If you’re struggling this season, I want you to know you’re not alone. Whether you’re grieving someone you love, battling mental health challenges, or facing financial or physical hardships, it’s okay to feel whatever you’re feeling. You don’t have to force a smile or pretend everything’s fine. It’s okay to let yourself mourn what you’ve lost or even the life you thought you’d have by now.
One thing that’s helped me is finding small ways to make the season my own. Some years, that’s meant lighting a candle and saying a quiet prayer for the people I miss. Other times, it’s been finding joy in little things—a favourite holiday movie, a cosy blanket, or even just a moment of stillness with a cup of tea. It doesn’t have to be big to matter.
And if you know someone who might be having a hard time, reach out to them. A text, a call, or just letting them know you’re thinking of them can mean more than you realise. Sometimes the best gift we can give is just showing up for each other—no grand gestures needed.
The holidays can be complicated, messy, and beautiful all at once. Wherever you are this season, I hope you find moments of peace and connection. And if you’re carrying something heavy, know that you’re not carrying it alone.
